Text Echos

PSA

2009-11-11T20:32:20Z

Just so's you know, Google has published a handy-dandy flu shot finder.

Mental image of the night.

2009-10-24T04:10:21Z

I'm listening to to Beethoven's Ode to Joy, one of my all-time favorite pieces of music, and I have the _best_ mental image in my brain. Here it is: I'm picturing this huge German dude, drunk off his Teutonic ass, wading through an office building, a busy downtown street, or maybe the DMV or something with a sledge hammer in one hand and a flame thrower in the other, belting out the chorus at the top of his lungs and laying waste to everything within reach. It's just so PERFECT! ... anyway, I'm gonna go get my boogie on now.

Edit >> Just occurred to me: KMFDM really should do a remix of this. ...

Edit Edit >> Psyche - see to that, would you?

Smirk ...Giggle ... BWAHAHAHAHAAAA

2009-10-08T16:09:58Z

The fountain of youth has been found... IN MY PANTS!

... Granted, it is awfully uncomfortable walking around with my trousers full of grapefruits...

Unspeakably cool.

2009-09-25T16:04:20Z

I have no words to express the cool, so I'll use the ones that other guy did...

Carl Sagan and Auto Tune sound so good together I think a rift just occurred in the space-time continuum.

Coolness

2009-09-25T15:32:01Z

The world can be a very dark and unpleasant place. Big things are more often more worrying than not. So I try to take my joy as I find it, in small ways. For instance, the usepic I used for this post. Anyway, I just found this cool websitewebsite, which I think is one of the best things around. It's called "It Made My Day", and it's just a place where people can post their small moments of WIN. If your google-fu is particularly weak, here's a link.
http://itmademyday.com/

It's not especially important, or significant, but it makes me feel better to know that it exists, that someone came up with the idea, and created this little bit of cool. Let me know what you think.

At long last...

2009-09-15T20:11:12Z

The first breeze of Autumn has come through South Florida; I just felt the change of seasons from muggy heat to blessed coolness. It's not dead yet, but Summer's back has broken. My daily miles from the train station to the office and back are going to be more pleasant from here on in, a fine way to begin and end the work day, and I am very much looking forward to that. No more feeling like I'm stepping into a mouth every time I leave a building! Time to open the windows, and reclaim the back yard from the failing, fleeing forces of the mosquitoes. Rejoice and make merry! The seasons are turning, and I am glad. I'm not sure how to describe the feeling of the air, exactly, but it is a balm most wondrous. It's maybe a superstition or an emotional / spiritual placebo of some kind, but I feel so much stronger in the Winter; so much more alive. After this long, miserable summer, it feels like my soul has roused from slumber, like Summer's long convalescence is at its end. Ah, but it feels grand!

WTF?

2009-09-15T14:41:27Z

Ok, I knew that insurance companies were inherently selfish corporate entities, but this is just plain EVIL.

Domestic Violence is considered a pre-existing condition...

Edit - Yeah, I suppose it is one more reason to leave an abusive relationship. But I doubt that was the idea, and as silver linings go, that is pretty weak when compared to the EVIL.

I knew he was cool...

2009-09-15T13:13:08Z

But I had no idea that Eddie Izzard was a goddamned super-hero!

You know who else is a super-hero?

tryss - Happy Birthday, Tryss!

Cool thing of the day.

2009-09-14T16:18:15Z

I was just thinking to myself that my remote control... It's rather boring, isn't it?

If only there were a more exciting, more ... 'magical' way to change channels...

Behold! the super-magical channel changing wand of slothful might and wonder!

Tivodium pausosa!

Advertisium Negatio!

OK, srsly...

2009-09-10T15:34:31Z

One of my firmly held beliefs is that the members of any large group, be it race, religion, nationality, or political party are not all that different when it comes down to it. Yes, there are always going to be a share of nutters and extremists, but generally, the people that make up any of these groups are not going to be inherently any more honest, moral, generous, or intelligent than the members of any other. When debates turn ugly, people love to make claims to the contrary, of course, but that's just people being people. (stupid when pissed off)

but lately, I've been seeing a disturbing statistical trend*, or at least I think I have been. In short:

What the buttery fuck is wrong with the Republicans?

Ever since the election, they've been like the Keystone Cops on extacy and meth. They've got the birthers, and they're warning people about 'death panels'. They're accusing Obama of being a socialist, and comparing him to hitler. It's not that what is being said is offensive (would you be offended if someone accused you of being a goldfish?) it's that the accusations are so patently and obviously false. I don't even mean the 'can be proven to be false' kind of false, I mean the 'OMG I thought you were joking and now I'm embarrassed for you because you aren't' kind of false. Yes, I realize that it's not the main body of the Republican Party that's making the crazier accusations (for the most part) but they're not doing a whole hell of a lot to distance themselves from the stooopid. I mean, shouldn't self-interest at least seem to demand that they make some statement to the effect of "OK, you know that the crazy fuckers over there aren't with us, right?"

And the sex scandals! Not that I have anything against getting laid, mind you. I also don't think that marital fidelity has shit to do with one's skill at being a politician, or one's political beliefs. So I don't judge them for getting some on the side; that's between them and their spouses, it's none of my business. But I find it odd that it seems to be that the vast majority of sex scandals star republicans. am I missing something here, or is there a growing body of statistical evidence that the democrats are a bit less hypocritical than their republican comrades? I mean, how the hell many Republicans that went the whole "Family Values" rout to get elected end up in such embarrassing sexual scandals? Are they stupid? Are they really that stupid? And why am I not seeing anything like the orgy of political idiocy from the Democrats? Is there really some vast media conspiracy that is hushing up all the scandals the democrats are involved in? Is it selective journalism?

The numbers just aren't adding up like I think they should. Either the republicans have actually become much more stupid and lecherous than the democrats, or I'm not working with accurate data. Honestly, I'm not sure which idea worries me more. Either a major political party is trying to climb up it's own ass for no discernible reason, or the news has gone even more hinky than I thought it was...

Anyway... Anybody out there in internet land have any theories, thoughts, or flagrant guesswork as to WTF is up with that?

*note- I'm not a statistician, or even a person very good at math, so I may well be completely of base here.

Early morning rainbow.

2009-09-08T14:04:17Z

I like rainbows. I think that they're good omens. Double rainbows moreso, and triple rainbows even better. This morning on the train to work, I saw a big, bright rainbow hanging just under the moon. I managed to get a picture of it, but it had faded a bit by the time I got the picture. I might post the picture when I get home, if I remember. This rainbow was cool because it was unusual. Unusual, I say, because there were only a few clouds in the sky, and it didn't feel as damp as it usually does when rainbows show up. So, a rainbow for no apparrent damned reason. This pleases me.

Someone get this man a wheelbarrow...

2009-09-04T16:36:55Z

to carry his enormous balls in.

note - In the beginning of the video, he's wearing a hat.

Hooray for equal time!

2009-09-04T15:43:51Z

http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/dpp/news/local/090831_satan_signs

that is all.

a shot in the dark.

2009-09-02T16:09:53Z

When I bought my house, I was inundated with fliers for what was called "mortgage insurance". The benefit of this insurance is that the mortgage is paid off in the event of the death of one of the mortgage holders. At the time, one of the mortgage holders was my 96yr old grandmother so that was understandably a deal-breaker for them. I've been sniffing around the internet with no luck since she died, but to no avail. My insurance company told me to talk to the lender (a regular 'ole bank). The bank told me to talk to the insurance company. The Insurance agent told me to talk to the Insurance company (different companies). Everyone seemed to be familiar with the idea, but none of them offered any such policy. I found a few companies online that offer something they call mortgage insurance, but their thing is for lenders, not lendees... So, I ask you: Does anyone know of this magical, mystical form of insurance, and where it can be found? I thought that my google-fu was strong, but in this case, it is not so strong.

Caffeinated Beef Jerky

2009-08-28T15:41:06Z

The title says it all.

Behold! The crowning achievement of the human race!

Tonight

2009-08-26T20:58:15Z

So, when I get home tonight, I have to go right back out to an open house at my son's high school. Man, I'm pretty nervous about that. I'm going meet his teachers. His high school teachers. This will be my first time meeting high school teachers since, well, being in high school. Makes me feel kind of old, even though I'm pretty sure I'll be one of the youngest parents there. Weird. ... Anyway, I'm going to get a mohawk and a shower before I go, that should help. After that, it's off to shoot some pool with a bunch of friends I've had since high school, but only recently reconnected with, and J, a chick I've been sort of seeing for a while now; somewhere between friend and girlfriend, I think, though it hasn't been discussed or even alluded to so far, which seems just fine by all concerned. All in all, it should be a fun night.

... and suddenly, there was a free taco! ... This can only be a good omen. :-)

Battle! .. and frustrating victory!

2009-08-19T22:33:48Z

So the manling was finally registered for school today, after they lost his registrations from the two preceding days, when he was also registered. Apparently, the third time _is_ a charm. Short version - after about two hours of sending us around from one office to another, like some kind of hapless bureaucratic pinball game, they found the paperwork from the first registration two days ago, and it turned out that the efforts of the preceding hours had been completely unnecessary, except for finally getting us to the person that had the missing papers. :: sigh :: After the first hour, I was told that there were already two partial registrations in the system, which was causing some kind of conflict, so he would have to be registered for a third time, but since the papers were attached to the two partial registrations, they would have to be re-submitted by fax. ... WTF? Luckily, I had brought a book with me, as the school administration was in full on charlie-foxtrot mode, and nothing was happening with any rapidity. At one point, I even saw one of the ladies manning the front desk go and have a quiet cry in one of the back rooms for a few minutes. I was, and still am, astounded that anything got done at all. I don't know if something had gone horribly awry this year for them, or what. For instance, they gave me a card with a big number seven on it. This number was never called by anyone, never asked for by anyone, and in fact, no-one could tell me what it was for. Including the school rentacop; when I finally left, the he didn't want me to give it back, despite the fact that it said "Property of " in big black letters on the back of it. All in all, the registration process was a spectacular example of comedic chaos, but there was frustrating victory at the end. ... and then I went to work and there's a hurricane coming, but they say it'll turn.

Flagrant Poultry!

2009-08-11T13:28:38Z

I love to cook. I like to think I'm pretty good at it. Here's the next thing I'll be making.

The Importance of Jus: Two Chickens in One Meal

A PSA, and The Super Hero On The Train

2009-08-07T13:07:55Z

It is not nice to bring a sack full of Mcdonald's breakfast on the train with you in the morning. It makes people want to beat you up and take away your breakfast, by force if necessary. Also, the conductor is not the usual mildly annoying guy. The conductor is a replacement conductor, a spare conductor, if you will, and she has super-powers. Seriously, she needs to wear a cape and boots to work. She could be called The Shriek, or maybe the Soprano of Vengeance. Her power is her voice. It can cut glass. It can set you teeth on edge. ...You don't want to know what it does to your ears. I'm cringing as we approach every station. For some reason, she feels the need to yell into the mic, like your grandmother who is still somehow accustomed to the phones from fifty years ago. That is, if your grandmother had a voice that could cut glass. I don't how this train still has windows... or passengers. Maybe the windows are made of plexiglass or lucite or something... Yes, that must be it.

Fun with physics.

2009-07-29T20:24:32Z

It's called a vortex cannon. It is made of equal parts physics and awesome.

... I am going to build one bigger than theirs, and point at my front door, concealed in the shrubbery about 30 feet away. It will be wired to the doorbell. There will be a sign next to the doorbell which will read, "Do not ring this doorbell more than twice." In any given 5 minute period, the first ring will prime it, the 2nd will arm it, and the third will summon the punch line.

just not fair

2009-07-28T15:37:14Z

Last night, I had a dream that was ... 'unfair'. It wasn't a nightmare or anything; haven't been treated to one of those for a long time. I woke up at around 5 or so, after one of those time dilated dreams that seemed to go on forever. Basically, I wasted the night dreaming of trying to get to sleep. then I couldn't get back to sleep. Holy pseudo-insomnia, Batman! I feel like I did the first time I ordered a crepe - cheated. It's a pancake, a roody-poo candy-assed pancake! I'd be pissed off about it, if I had the energy. This bodes. Bodes like a hatfull of moons it does, and not well.

AT&T now stand for "Amazingly Tempting Target"

2009-07-27T14:37:16Z

So AT&T has decided to block 4chan... Get your popcorn ready, boys and girls. This is gonna be good.

Also, Cogent Communications has also signed themselves up for a subscription to No-Fun Weekly. Let the games begin!

George the lug nut... the fall.

2009-07-26T02:20:28Z

At long last, George the mighty has been defeated. Done in by mine own two hands this very day. Let history show that he did not go down without a fight. He never surrendered, he never begged quarter. He was a doughty foe, but in the end his tenacity was no match for my indomitable will, legendary might, and sheer determination. The liberal application of penetrating oil and two pneumatic impact wrenches didn't hurt, either. (Seriously, two impact wrenches. He actually killed the first one.)

I'll post the full story of the battle sometime soon, probably tomorrow once I wake up and find my name. For now, I am hung over, worn out, scraped up, and, of course, profoundly satisfied with myself. :-) There shall be a shower, followed by a meal, followed by the sound of one Mr. Kires passing right the fuck out.

Common sense win!

2009-07-24T18:36:55Z

Training blind people to detect tumors.

equations of morality. -or- A lunch worth of ethical navel-gazing.

2009-07-24T17:04:58Z

I've been thinking about manipulation/coercion, and when it is morally justified. The hardest aspect of this question to pin down is, I think, the determination of how complicated and precise to make the analysis. There are so many potential factors for any given situation that one can easily run the complexity up to levels that far surpass the ability of the human mind to handle, and certainty becomes impossible pretty fast. It seems that precision has an inverse relationship with applicability. And the law of diminishing returns will make you feel pretty dumb pretty fast. Like, if you need a 3/4 inch wrench to take off a lug nut (FUCK YOU, GEORGE) then a 20 mm wrench will do the job; you don't need to go out and get one that measures exactly 19.05 mm, and breaking out the 'ole electron microscope the make sure that it's 19.050000000mm would be just plain silly when you've got a flat tire.

Say you have a loved one who takes anti-psychotic meds regularly, which keep them from losing their grip on reality. If they stop taking them, then they go crazy, and do damnage to whoever is handy, be that you, themselves, or the unsuspecting ups guy. You know from past experience that when they're thinking clearly, they see the necessity of the meds, and they are happier when their brains work properly. But maybe they ran out or forgot, and now they're not wanting to take them... In this case, it is clearly well and proper to manipulate them into taking their fucking pills by telling them it's candy, or threatening the life of their invisible friend, or whatever it takes to get the pills down. That's a no-brainer. But if they're that dude from A Beautiful Mind, it gets a bit more complicated, especially if they're in the middle of developing an equation that will maybe result in that whole fusion thing getting solved. Like, how much damnage is likely as a result of no pills and to how many people? How much good will be accomplished by letting them be off their meds for a while? To what degree does their right to choose come into play, and how does that relate to the choice they would make if they were thinking clearly? What it all boils down to is who has the ethical right to make that decision, under what circumstances does that change, and the thing I'm working on now, how can this determination be reliably made?

I don't expect to find an answer other than, "Do the best you can with the brains you got", but a general guideline would sure come in handy. Life-threatening situations are easy, but what about ones that are just 'potentially' life-threatening? If someone has a probable head injury, is it appropriate to make them go to a hospital to get checked out, despite their protestations that they're fine? What if they're shocky and slurring their speech? What if they're not? What if you have only third-hand information? I'm not really interested in the answer. I'm looking for how to properly calculate the formula those questions are parts of.

When is it ok for one person to impose their will on another, how clearly does it need to be 'for their own good' for that to be justified? Kids and vegetables, family and drugs, lovers and suicide, drunk friends and weapons... how to tell when it is right to coerce someone into doing what is good for them? Should you even take into account whether they'll thank you for it when the dust settles, or should you be satisfied with the knowledge that if they resent you for it, that will mean that they survived to resent you?

If someone is about to walk off a cliff because they don't see it, it's ok to snatch 'em back with a quickness. What about if they're about to walk into a spiderweb, complete with a mystery spider waiting in the middle? On the one hand, it is inherently wrong to impose your will on someone else. On the other, it is wrong to fail to protect loved ones from cliffs and spiders. The hard part isn't making the decision at the moment; instinct and reflex is going to make that happen far faster than logic's ponderous machinations, so it isn't something that you really decide. The hard part is figuring out how much relative value to assign to their right to choose, compared to the cost-benefit of action v/s inaction. And, if you see someone about to walk into a spiderweb, will they thank you for stopping them, or will they resent you for it? It's not that question I'm working on; it's how much relative importance to give that question, and how to make that determination.

And how much thought should be devoted to doing the right thing? Does life or quality of life matter more than the right to choose? Err on one side, and you're a controlling fuckhead that stifles everyone around you. Err on the other, and you're an rationalizing fuckhead who can justify letting down a friend down when they need help.

Ah, the eternal question: How to not be a fuckhead? That's what I'm really working on, I guess.

Yeah, but that sounds so much less cool...

* Yes, I am fully aware of how damnage is spelled in the dictionary.
** I am also aware that these thoughts aren't very well organized or worded, this is just a rough draft, 'get it in print before I forget it' kind of thing, not a paper I'm submitting.